water seeping

(no subject)

So  my therapist has moved me from anti-depressants to stimulants! Which is supposed to get me ~productive~ and less slumpy and apparently, diagnose me with insomnia and less appetite to the point I need to REMEMBER I have to eat. This sounds like an entertaining experience in my two months of slumpinesss.

Then my physician almost made me cry by going, "You go to school? When are your classes? Do you work?" and I was like "Stop asking. Please"

I guess I do really have difficulty talking about it and talking about it more (apparently or so wiser people like my mom has told me) will help me get over it. Because lots of people don't get college right? Lots of people screw up their contracts and courses right??? ... Yeah, it still really hurts like a bitch to say it.

I'mmm not gonna start on the stimulants today, but possibly tomorrow. Today, I'm going to zen myself out and perhaps finally start on Tales of Vesperia. Or watch more Star Trek. Both good options!

I'm on stimulants and I forget to eat some days too! That's why you need people to kick you and ask if you've eaten yet. I'm sure your flist will happily oblige.

I hope things get better for you!
... [sits in the university drop-out area]

lolol 2.7 GPA and federal said they can't help me pay for school lolol
Last year I majorly screwed up the courses I was taking, and it sort of embarrasses me to the point that typing this down makes me blush. So, yes, you're certainly not alone there.
You are not alone! I'm in the same boat. It's part of the reason why I've come to despise small talk so much. aaaauughhh NO I HAVE NO LIFE, THANK YOU FOR REMINDING ME. orz orz orz
You're not alone in not getting college. It's just not for quite a lot of people. *Hugs*
I was close to bursting into tears when I realized I had no tissues SO THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN AWKWARD.
You know how long it took me to start college and you know I'm always here for you no matter what. Those kind of questions always made me feel like a failure, so I . . . can relate so hard. And yes, start Tales of Vesperia. I LOVE YOUUUUUUU.

ALSO!! I always tell you to eat. :'(

Edited at 2009-10-27 04:00 am (UTC)
I hope it works out for you. And I can kick you to eat whenever.

I hate that question too. I hated it most when I spent ten or so months failing to find a job. All I can say is that it'll turn around.

College is definitely not everyone's thing. (Hell, college was my thing, and I barely made it through because of my sickness. There are so, so many things that can get thrown in a person's way that can then throw a person off-course.) So many of us have been raised in the thinking that it's The Only Way and that not succeeding in that Only Way means that we're failures. While I do believe that education is key to life, it comes in many different forms, and the Standard College Route is just one of them. This seems to be hitting a lot of people I know hard in different ways -- those for whom it was painfully not the right thing and those who did the Standard College Route... and now still find themselves with nowhere to go. You're definitely not alone in feeling like something went seriously screwy and now everything has to somehow be put back together again.

I hope that the stimulants are helpful for you!
It doesn't help that despite the fact that my family and I are very anglo-centric, we're still Asian, we live in Asia, Asia is like the community HUB for pro-education and college etc. Anything else seems unfathomable.

♥ Thanks honey.
i've been failing miserably at life for going on five years now; you're not alone. ♥

and ughhh word to the crazy asian education expectations, that must double the suck. /snuggles
The human body can go without food for 60 days. However, having (not quite intentionally) attempted surviving on nothing but milo and cookies for four days last sem, I do not recommend this path. (I lost maybe about a kilo of muscle or thereabouts.)

I know someone who didn't pass into the next year of their course...because they failed to re-enrol. As medicos one runs into the occasional case/story of people dropping out because of sickness, physical and mental.

Psych drugs are weird things that we know um next to nothing about. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don't. Some will be right effective for some people, but have no effect on another person. And some will just have really borked side effects. Don't be shy when it comes to shopping around--it might take forever to find a combination that works, but that's normal.
btw, unrelated, but are you a fan of neil gaiman &/or amanda palmer? they're in singapore around 30/10 - 02/11 doing free signings and little shows and stuff, & i thought you might like to know.
Um, a bit belatedly, I've had to go on stimulants before, and I had the same appetite problem. If you're still around your computer a lot, you might find it helpful if you set an alarm on it? Something that buzzes at your normal eating time, 12pm or whenever, to remind you to check if you've eaten. Or one of the gmails to-do lists that pops up when you look at your email. It helped me a lot in remembering, personally, although it isn't for everyone.
Hey, I totally screwed up college. I'm still trying!!!!11 Also Tales of Vesperia is great. GOOD LUCK

[totally had a full paid scholarship and was anticipating graduating last year- hasn't graduated yet, is still on academic probation, and obv. lost that scholarship :|]