September 17th, 2008

water seeping

"You thought there was a secret chord...."

How does it feel when you read something? Sometimes, there's a sense of happiness, maybe one of completion. I can't say all of them are the same since what you read is different.

I, myself, tend to fall in love with what I read. Not always, mind you. Just often enough. And the problem with falling in love with something is that it makes you completely irrational. And then the pain comes. When the story hurts, I start to hurt. Sometimes I cry and sometimes, I can't even get the words out, the feeling so strong I have to bite my lip and look elsewhere.

I can tell you now, it's not something I'm proud of. This "falling in love" with a book or a story. I feel it weakens me in some way.

At the same time, I don't think I could give up this part of me for the world. And it will stay. For how long, I wonder. But it stays for now.

Till then, I suppose I will just keep hurting and loving.
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