
WILL: I am American, and therefore more accessible to a modern audience!
THE TWINS: *are Fred and George. Also, they have a damn body outline taped to their floor, what the hell.*
ONE OF THE OTHER BROTHERS, GOD KNOWS WHICH ONE: *is also there*
THE REST OF WILL'S SIBLINGS: *are not.*
THE HOUSE: *is very suburban US*
MERRIMAN: *is British*
THE RIDER: *is British*
EVERYONE ELSE, INCLUDING THE ENTIRE POPULATION OF A BUCKINGHAMSHIRE SHOPPING CENTRE: *is not.*
WILL: I am in love with Maggie!
MAGGIE: I am young, thin, and good-looking!
MERRIMAN: I don't look anything like Merriman. Judging by the dialogue we've gotten so far, I don't sound anything like him, either.
THE RIDER: I actually seem to be quite close to canon, so far.
THE RIDER'S HORSE: Lucky you.
WILL: ZOMG GUESS WHAT EVERYONE I HAVE MAGIC POWERS.
MERRIMAN: Will, you are the seventh son of a seventh son!
WILL: ...Then where are all my other brothers?
MERRIMAN: ...They died?
WILL: I have three dead older brothers?
MERRIMAN: Look, you can throw knives into a wall using only your mind!
WILL: Hey, cool!
WILL AND MAGGIE: *snog*
WILL'S NON-TWIN BROTHER: I'm going to help you fight the Dark!
WILL: Okay!
The Dark is Rising. Coming Soon.
Meanwhile, the whole community has sworn off the film. >.>