Sanzo x Hakkai
Sanzo: *shoots him*
Sanzo: Much better.
Ban x Kazuki
Ban: (insert blatant sarcasm) Wow. You’re effeminate.
Ban: And what’s with the hair?
Kazuki: I KNOW OKAY?! I’M STEREOTYPED AS A FRIGGIN’ GIRL WHO ALWAYS NEEDS TO BE RESCUED AND FALLS IN A HORRIBLY MUSHY ROMANCE WITH YOU!!! HAPPY?
Ban: ….I’m gay…
Goku x Gojyo
Goku: Can I eat you?
Gojyo: O___O NO!!!!
Kai x Rei
Rei: Let’s talk about some meaningless thing so that it leads to emotional I’m-such-an-angst-machine sex and me acting like a pathetic depressed uke. What do you say?
Rei: I thought so.
Rei x Mao
Rei: I love you.
Mao: Me too.
Rin: >< Not in public please!!!
Spike x Faye
Faye: You annoy me.
Faye: And you’re irritating.
Faye: Wanna go on a meaningful date and sound scarily OOC?
Faye: I love you.
Sanzo x Goku
Sanzo: … *twitching*
Gokue: But Saaaanzoooo!
Sanzo: Okay fine! We can have sex tonight! My cold front is just an act to get those freaky authors off our backs.
Jet x Faye
Faye: But you’re older that me. A lot older.
Jet: Since when has that stopped the fangirls?
Faye: …Good point.
Faye x Ed
Ed: Beautiful Viewtiful Girly Swirly!
Faye: …Are you hitting on me?
Homura x Goku
Homura: I want you
Goku: Hmm…will you get me meatbuns for dinner?
Goku: ^__^ Yay! *jumps into Homura’s arms* Take me now!
(author pauses to laugh hysterically)
Zoro x Sanji
Sanji: I hate you
Sanji: Shit, I forgot that in fangirl language hate = love
Ginji x Natsumi
Natsumi: Hey Ginji-san?
Natsumi: Go out with me?
Ginji: O__O But you’re still in high school! Plus, you’re a girl!
Natsumi: I’ll make you sandwiches.
Ginji: …So when do we leave?
Ban x Himiko
Himiko: I hate you. You killed my brother.
Himiko: Yet I feel the urge to bear your children because we share that dark mysterious past that gives fangirls over-active plot bunnies.
Ban: *irritated* Look, how many times do I have to tell them I’m gay?!
Ginji x Akabane
Akabane: Hello Ginji-kun *purrs*
Ginji: A-Akabane-san! You creep me out!
Akabane: Oh I’m sorry. Want me to profess my undying love to or ravage you senseless when you go to sleep?
Ginji: *mutters* And that’s even creepier.
Kazuki x Juubei
Kazuki: Juubei, I want to have sex tonight. With bondage. Oh! And Vanilla lube!
Juubei: *sighs* As you wish Kazuki-sama. But can we have strawberry instead?
Homura x Konzen
Homura: Do I even know you?
Fudou x Ban
Fudou: Midou Ban! Midou Ban! Midou Ban! Midou Ban! Midou Ban! Midou Ban!
Ban: (insert sarcasm) Oh yes, that’s a real turn-on.
Sephiroth x Cloud:
Sephiroth: Come here Cloud.
Cloud: *whimpers, but comes closer*
Sephiroth: That’s a good bitch.
Muraki x Tsuzuki
Muraki: You know, I originally wanted your body so that I may plant my dead brother’s head on it and torture him, but I’ve fallen in deep passionate love with you.
Tsuzuki: *sighs* I guess I have no choice, so I must submit like the good uke I am, despite the fact I’m the most powerful Shinigami.
Muraki: Good. Want to see my doll collection?
Yugi x Yami
*start making out*
Sephiroth x Vincent
Sephiroth: Wanna make out?
Sephiroth: I guess not.
Lloyd x Kratos
Kratos: I have to say it…Lloyd, I’m your father.
Lloyd: Kratos, we’ve been over this before. Incest of any sort does not deter the fangirls!
Zelos x Lloyd
Zelos: Here I am, the irresistible playboy and yet I’m hopelessly attracted to the clueless brunette over there.
Lloyd: …Who exactly are you talking about? Genis?
Tsuzuki x Hisoka
Tsuzuki: I get dibs on the uke!
Hisoka: No, I get dibs!
Hisoka: No, me!
Tsuzuki: …Want ice-cream?
Hisoka: Sure. And I get to be uke.
Dougan x Sanzo
Dougan: I love you, worship you. I belong to you, Sanzo-sama—
Sanzo: *shoots him*
Sanzo: These idiots don’t give up, do they?
Tyson x Kai:
Tyson: I love you because I’ll always there and I’ll be by your side.
Kai: Now, how do I detach you?
Max x Rei
Max: I’m the hyper uke! Love me and my adorable-ness!
Rei: *sighs* I hate being seme
Max: You poor soul. Do you want to be on top this time?
Rei: You really mean it? I love you Max!!
Max: No need to go overboard now…
Gojyo x Sanzo
Gojyo: Wanna do it?
Sanzo: You’re asking me?!
Gojyo: …You’re right… *rapes him*
Goku x Nataku
Nataku: Hey, you’re a heretic like me and for some strange reason I am attracted to you despite the fact we’re only ten.
Goku: Gee, I don’t know. Konzen gets awfully twitchy about stuff like this.
Nataku: Don’t worry. I’ll go into a coma soon, so no one will know.
Homura x Rinrei
Homura: Rinrei…my beloved Rinrei….
Rinrei’s ghost: Look love, I’m dead. Could you get over it already?
Homura: If you say so. Oh Go~ku!
Rinrei’s Ghost: ….
Ban x Shido
Ban: Don’t I hate your guts?
Shido: Remember the fangirl formula Ban. Hate = love when done right.
Ban: Okay. But don’t bite too hard.
Akabane x Kagami
Kagami: Wow. I’m attracted to the scary guy with a black coat and hat.
Akabane: So am I. Want to play with my scalpels?