Title: P(l)otholes in Manhattan (Or why Princesses belong in towers)
Fandom: Enchanted/Pocahontas 2/various disney crossovers
Summary: Manhattan is a special place to live in.
Most portals to other worlds, Robert reasoned, were sensible things. Books, mirrors, a lake and sometimes, even a magical closet. To be fair, magic never made sense to Robert, but since he's now adopted himself a princess from another world, he tried to bend his logic to adapt the more ...illogical aspects of his life.
It was hard but someone had to do it.
The main problem centered on the fact he lived in Manhattan. And in Manhattan delights in twisting what little norms he had left (he counted) just by being Manhattan. It was like the Twilight Zone of USA. Or the Ghostbuster Central of the paranormal. He's pretty sure Ripley considered the city to be its own eighth or ninth wonder just by existing.
So, what did Manhattan had for portals?
Well. It had potholes.
He could see the C.S Lewis society crying into their books already.
So occasionally, when Robert and Giselle went for a walk (she insisted it was good for "karma" and "auras"), she tended to have this unfortunate attraction for potholes. Mostly, falling in them and landing up in a completely different world.
And Robert like the poor sap in love that he is, tended to fall in right after. Without a rope even. Being in love meant a temporary loss of sanity.
These worlds (or as Giselle fondly calls them fairytales) seem to cover almost everything. He's met talking deer, run very far from attacking Hun army and even met a robot who seems to keep insisting his name is Eva. He firmly the little guy that a) he was taken b) He didn't swing that way c) He's not Eva.
The order seemed appropriate at the time.
Throughout these sudden miraculous journeys in these potholes (Robert calls them plotholes. Who wouldn't?), Robert had not found one person who thought the world had gone mad with singing men and women in the streets and the sudden outburst "Be our guest" among the cutlery.
Robert found himself standing next to a John Rolfe who is currently hiding his head in his hands in a form of despair Robert was all too aware of. In his view was one tall graceful Native American princess, climbing a tree and singing at the same time (which was very impressive actually) with literally all of England at the tree base, singing out to her. Also, Giselle was attempting to climb the tree to join the singing princess, but her gown was getting in the way.
"So," Robert said hopefully, "First time, huh?"
John Rolfe groaned, "They've gone mad."
Robert helpfully patted the man on the back. He heard a small whimper and couldn't help an inward grin.
"How long are they going to do this for?"
Robert checked his watch, "...Four more minutes."
"Is that enough time for a bloke to get a drink?"
"Depends on how close the bar is."
John Rolfe perked up a bit, "There's a nice place close by. My treat?"
Robert chuckled. So far, this is the best plothole ever.
...not a word :/