water seeping

(no subject)

Dear Nathan,

Ah, I'm really bad aren't I? I should be, well, writing more often. I do miss you. A lot. Singapore is nice, but there aren't many people like yourself. And um, if you ever hate me or feel angry towards me, it's okay. I probably deserve it. I should be done more shouldn't I? Well, I can't spend forever regretting it. But I, we shared something special. And I was glad to be part of that.


I'm rambling really badly. I guess I shouldn't be rambling. You probably have more important things to do now than read this.


But, Happy Valentine's Day. Take care and write back as much as possible. And um, avoid forwarded messages as much as you can. I'd prefer if you wrote back yourself.


And I miss you so very much.


Love,
Ayesha


You know, it figures that I would mess up the one thing that meant something to me. I don't know why I posted this. I'm so sad that way, scrummaging for sympathy. You guys can tell me I suck. Because I do. So badly.
  • Current Music: Himitsu - Yuki Kajiura
HEY! CHEER UP! *darts eyes about* You're gonna make me cry. He has nothing more important to do than to read this. You're a part of a lot of meaningful things. WE LOVE YOU! Don't cry, damn it! Since you never told me the name of the guy you were going out with, I'm going to assume this is it. I know I don't know much about what happened either and it's painful for you and you don't have to tell me. You don't deserve hatred of any sort, shame on you! We wuv you and we know you're a good person, and above all, human. I don't write to my friend in HK anymore because I feel guilty that I didn't before (not large scale angst fest potential, but hopefully some manner of relevant). You want to pour it out? Then talk to him, talk to us. You want to angst, fine, LiveJournal is your friend and so are we ( I mean Nat and Viola and Subin and stuff, I don't have multiple personality disorder). Talk woman, talk. No, darn it woman, don't cry!

Attempt to cheer up follows
There's a lighter side to this. Do you know there's a character on fictionpress that's a heck of a lot like Emir who's name is Nathan? (*crosses fingers* Don't be depressed, don't be depressed)Total idiot and he is kinda involved with Kitty-chan, (where did you think the Kitty-chan name came from?) who is a heck of a lot like Viola. It was kind of a running joke between Emir and I that he was Nathan and Viola Kitty-chan. He ate radioactive burritos... Oh well, the author's name was DreyonLegacy. I maintain that either Emir is DreyonLegacy or the two lead freakily parallel lives.

More on topic cheering up
Whaddya mean no one like him? We're special! (We're special right? *insecurity showing*) And what about Han! Whaddya mean the 'one thing', I'm hurt, I thought we had something! *dramatic swoon-like gesture*. Plus points for using the word 'scrummage', I never get to say that word, maybe I should say that word. *says scrummage* Okay, I've broadened my 'unspoken-vocabulary-you-see-a-lot-in-books-but-have-finally-said' I'd feel better if I'd factored it into one of our conversations. Remind me to say 'scrummage'. AND YOU DON'T SUCK! To prove this to you, we will find another focus for suckage.
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NAT! or um... Barney! Yeah, that's it. BARNEY SUCKS! Barney sucks so much that there's just a trickle left over for me and none for you. Bag girl, no suckage! The suckage is mine, ALL MINE!

*sympathy vibes*



If it makes you feel any better, I just spent the latter half of dinner and some time after that crying bitterly.
haha u suck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

just kidding and u know that..me totally dateless for valentine but that shoudnt surprise u..but i keep my head up..
ummm
im also hungary so ill eat some turkey whith chilli...hehe

love
shehz
*hugs*

...damnit, why can I never think of the right things to say? Or anything at all for that matter.

*gives up and gives more hugs and a couple of double chocolate chip cookies* (comfort food will cure everything but the common cold and cancer)

And damnit, the world does not work right when anyone as wonderful as you can feel miserable like this. *really wishes she could be there to give you a real hug*